May 28 2007
The tale of Firefly and the reverse culture shock
I had spent one full year living in Japan. I had battled with cultural shocks, I had battled my own pre-conceived ideas about life and culture. I had sat on a crowded train carriage, to look around and notice I was the only foreigner around. I had 1 year of ups and downs and sideways curves. 1 year of struggling with the language, and just plain struggling to fit in. 1 year of stress and problems at work caused by Bill and Shane. I wasn¡Çt yet ready to leave Japan, but god was I ready to go back home for a holiday.
When I came to Japan, naturally, I was extremely open to the Japan experience. I was a big Australian sponge, ready and primed to extract meaning and experiences from everything around me. I had eaten lots of Japanese food, I had even studied a smidgeon of Japanese. I had made some Japanese friends in Australia in the weeks prior to my trip to Japan. I was locked and loaded for Japan. As such, when I landed, nothing really took me by surprise. I had no singular ¡Èculture-shock¡É, that all the travel books like to talk about. I said ¡Èwow, that¡Çs interesting¡É, and ¡Èhm, that¡Çs a bit different¡É more times than I could count (and I still do!), but nothing seriously hit me in the face, or took the wind out of me.
When I went into a shop in Japan for the first time, everyone looked at me, smiled, and almost shouted : "Irraishaimase!". I was a bit confused, and had no idea how to appropriately respond, so I simply nodded my head, smiled awkwardly and proceeded with my purchase. I later asked a Japanese person what "Irraishaimase" means. He said : "It is for when you go into a shop. The shop people are welcoming you. If they do not welcome you, it is very rude in Japanese culture, because you are the customer. You don’t even need to respond, because you are the customer!" He explained.
Even after he told me that it was not necessary to respond, I still had a lot of trouble with this. Naturally, I was brought up in Australia to respond to people who talk to you. When you walk into a shop, and 3 people drop what they’re doing, flash you a big smile, and say heartily "WELCOME TO OUR SHOP!", it’s hard to ignore that. Once I tried to reply back. A staff member looked right at me, and said "Irrashaimase!", and I looked back, smiled, and said "Arigatou Gozaimasu!". She looked at me uncomfortably. I looked back. She slowly turned back to her work, obviously unsure of how best to respond. I realised this approach wasn’t working either. All I was doing was transferring the awkwardness I was feeling back onto her.
Another time, I went into a shop with a guy who had been living in Japan for a couple of years. He walked in first, so a couple of staff looked at him, and said "Irrashaimase!" and he brushed past them, not even looking at their faces. This horrified me. Later that week I went into a shop with a Japanese friend, and of course, the same thing happened. I started to realise that not acknowledging these people is not a bad thing, it’s just a natural part of the culture.
Slowly, but surely, my view on this was changed. I became used to walking into a shop, looking at a staff person, the staff person saying "Irraishaimase", and me either nodding, or not even acknowledging it. This became the normal routine for me : walk in, Irraishaimase, ignore, proceed with shopping.
One time, someone saw me walk into their shop. They DIDN’T say irraishaimase. Of course, I’m a foreigner, and I look like a foreigner, but I was used to my regular routine, and I felt upset that someone had messed with it. I stopped in my tracks, and stared at him. He stopped and looked back at me, and after a few seconds of awkward pause (for him, I knew I was in the right so I didn’t feel awkward at all), he coughed nervously and said "uh…. irraishaimase." In this case I smiled back to defuse the tension, and proceeded with my shopping.
After a while, I realised that this is the culture, and I adapted. If the FOB Firefly ("fresh off the boat") saw the "one year living in Japan" Firefly, I can tell you he would be absolutely shocked at how I was treating shop staff. He’d shake me and say "What the hell is wrong with you? She just looked right at you, and welcomed you for coming into the shop! Say something!!". Of course, I would simply smile and pat him on the back, since his conversion into the non-reactive shopper would already be in the making.
Anyway, returning to the first paragraph, I had spent one year in Japan, and I was due to go back home to Australia at Christmas time. I was brimming with excitement. I would be able to see my friends, my family. I’d be able to go to a beautiful Australian beach. I would be able to sit down at a coffee shop with an English newspaper, breathe in the fresh air, and drink a cappuchino. I’d be able to buy some Vegemite! Eat a Tim-Tam!
I arranged the administrations side of my trip, and before I knew it, I was on the plane burning a path across the Pacific Ocean. I jumped at the chance to catch up on a couple of recent movies that was showing on the entertainment system, then I went to sleep.
I was nudged awake by a member of the Quantas staff. "Noodles or the eggs!". Groggily, I opted for the eggs. Both choices are incorrect actually, but the eggs are the lesser of 2 evils. A short while after consuming the packaged meal, the sun intensified within the cabin, and the captain came onto the intercom, and advised us that we’ve already commenced decent into Sydney, and we’ll be landing at 6:35am. I bounced up and down in my seat.
Finally, the plane landed. I didn’t even wait for the seatbelt sign to turn off, I jumped up from my seat, grabbed my bag from the overhead locker, and bounced to the front of the queue. Some of the cabin crew shot me a distasteful look, but immediately softened their expression upon seeing the excitement in my eyes. The hatchway opened and I bounded into the terminal. I was overcome with emotion. The air was clean and fresh. All of the signs were in English. People walked past me, speaking in English. I walked through duty free - all foreign products! I mean, all Australian products!!
I bounced along to immigration. The main sitting behind the desk took my passport, looked at me, and asked :
"Where have you been young man?"
"Tokyo, Japan!" I replied, excited to speak English.
He looked at the computer screen, and paused.
"Welcome home." He closed my passport, handed it back to me and smiled warmly.
I smiled back, grabbed my passport, and went through to baggage collection. I waited for a few minutes for my bag to appear from the conveyor belt, and walked out the exit. My parents were due to meet me, but a quick glance around confirmed that they weren’t there. I stood in the airport, among the English din, surrounded by foreigners (I mean, Australians), and just smiled.
I suddenly realised my throat was dry. Mount Franklins water!! My favourite brand of bottled water. I looked left and right, and quickly located a convenience store. I walked over, and entered the shop. Behind the counter was an Indian guy, looking busy with his work. I walk into the shop, plant my feet down, and look at the Indian.
He looks up at me for a moment, and then returns to his work. I remain frozen in place, staring at him. He continues work for a few more seconds until his eyes flick up, and he sees that I am still there, staring at him.
I’m excited, but also very tired since I didn’t sleep much on the flight, but on some level I dimly realise that I am waiting for him to say "Irraishaimase." I continue to stare.
He drops the papers he had in his hands, and looks over to me. He opens his mouth to speak. My
eyebrows rise in anticipation.
"What the fuck are you looking at?" He says, in a thick Indian accent.
"I… er… what, the… what?" I stutter back.
"Are you going to buy something? Or do I need to call security!" He continued, enunciating the word security with a sharp poke of his finger. He leaned back, waiting for my response.
"Oh, right, yes, I’m sorry. Mount Franklins water please. I apologise." I shake my head to try to rattle out the fog, and hand him over some Australian money I had already converted. He looks at me like I crawled out of a drainpipe, hands me my chance, and doesn’t even say "thank you".
I was stunned for 30 minutes after this interaction. For the first time in my life, I had experienced the elusive "reverse-culture shock".
Welcome home.
——-
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It gets worse.
And lasts longer. Mostly because you don’t expect it. You were expecting an adjustment
going to Japan, and oddly enough, you did adjust. You aren’t expecting to have to adjust
on your return — but adjust you must do.
And, unfortunately, there’s no going back home — because home is the same, but you
aren’t. And won’t be ever again…
Good luck.
we have a whole website about reverse culture shock - roadjunky.com
we’d love to have you write more about Japan for us.
I don’t see what is so “elusive” about reverse culture shock we all experience it when living abroad and finally going back home. I also don’t see why you would stare at any clerk waiting to hear an “irasshaimase”.
brandon: its like in the Zelda games where you walk into a store and everything pauses for the greeting to take place. From the story it seems like in Japan there is a more direct awareness of whats in your immediate vicinity, versus a general perception of everything going on around you.
staring? is this grade school or something or is it an australian thing? next time add a frown or a grimace, that way you will sound even more like a senile old man haha
btw did you learn Japanese in the year you spent there? you wrote that you were excited to speak English but if you didn’t know Japanese what else were you speaking there?
The airline is spelt Qantas btw
i enjoyed your comment about the english din, after 2 years out of the usa and sometimes going up to 6 months without speaking to an american - i sat on the train back to palo alto from the airport just listening to everyone talk. felt like taking a warm bath.
back in malaysia now, no super burrito for many thousands of miles…
aiyoooo… i mean.. fuck!
Great article! As an expat who’s been living in Prague for the last 6 years, I have experienced the (actually not so elusive) reverse culture shock many times, and really enjoyed such a good characterization of it.
It’s strange, but to me I experience the reverse culture shock much more than the (forward?) culture shock. Like you said, culture shock is subtle, whereas reverse culture shock smacks you across the head like a 2×4. The thing is, with your own culture you notice all the (reverse) strangeness in one quick flood, whereas in a foreign one it comes in small epiphanies. That’s why the power is so much greater coming back.
Bravo!!
Great article, great writing
Thanks for that
After returning home from a semester studying in Spain, I had nearly the same experience as you. I never really experienced culture shock in Spain, but I remember vividly being at a New Jersey Turnpike rest stop on the way home from the airport, and the cashier treating me in some subtly different way, and me being extremely confused.
Obviously not a great story, since I don’t remember exactly what happened, I just wanted to say that the experience you describe rang true.
Something similar happens when I return from Korea to the United States. I find myself bowing my head any time I go into a shop, buy something, and complete the transaction at the cash register. I just hope the bowing comes across as friendly nodding instead.
Coming back from Japan after a year and a half to a small western town was weird. Had someone used neutron bombs or had the plague wiped out the population? Where is everybody? Why the wide streets and no cars? Huge,stores almost empty, with aisles that looked like they were mean to drive through but no cars.
One of the first times I drove, on a two lane highway out in the middle of nowhere, I drove about ten miles before I realized I was on the wrong side of the road. Wasn’t as dangerous as it sounds because you could see for miles in any direction.
Great post. I have Hitching a Ride with Buddha on my reading pile, about a canadian guy who hikes Japan from North to South. You made me want to pick it up
You have the most interesting and readable blog on the web.
Imagine you had to come back to Argentina instead of Australia (in my case from Italy), consider yourself fortunate!
Lovely post. Surely struck a chord!
As a displaced American who’s been living in Japan, Australia and New Zealand for the past 15 years, I can tell you that I don’t really care to experience the inevitable “reverse culture shock” that awaits me, especially in a post 911 America.
Honestly, I think the fake sincerity of the Japanese makes a delicious juxtaposition to the brutal honesty of the Australians (with New Zealand being the perfect balance). I guess I’m just the kind of guy who likes his food super sweet or super spicy with none of that bland-assed howard johnson bullshit America emits in copious quantities.
Would one of the three countries *PLEASE* let me become a citizen?
I’m dreading going back home with all the blunt rude foreigners.. er, I mean, westerners. They’re so fat too! The new customer thing is here in China, too, but they certainly don’t embrace any sense of the customer always being right.
Ah yes, the shock of returning home. I lived in Nara for over 4 years. I loved living where I did but the economy was really going downhill by 1994 so I decided it was time to leave. Going home was not so easy I found. From 1990 to 1995 I had changed and so had Canada which had had an economic slowdown at the start of the 90s. I wasn’t very thrilled about being “home” and I could have easily packed my bags and taken off for parts unknown during the first year back. It took about a year to settle down and acclimatize. Going was easy, returning was hard.
Brilliant !! it is really fun to read! Thank you so much. I wonder that what it is going to you feel in the future. No.1 coment (written by Mr. William) As he said, If your expectation became Japan’s way and would you still feel comfort to live in Australia with no Japanese culture expectation but you can be Austrailan with your favorite things and your family and old friends are around you all the time? It seems difficult to find your home if you living with different culture for long time.
sorry for writing comment by my “Poor english”.
Hilarious. I’m from the US working in India for the next couple of months. I think I might experience some reverse culture shock as well when I get back. Thanks for the heads up.
That indian guy was just being a dick man
Yes, reverse culture shock is particularly bad after leaving Japan.
Theres a fun article about this on Stippy. I think we can identify with many of these:
http://www.stippy.com/japan-culture/leaving-japan/
I’ve experienced reverse culture shock a lot. I lived in Fiji for a while, then returned to the U.S: Major culture shock. I also lived in Thailand for three years and then returned: Even greater culture shock. I talk about it on my web site, Love Across Borders.
Hey
Did you sample any of the LBFM’s?
Humm, I am still trying to figure out why you were staring at the Indian guy in the convenience store?!?!?
I live in Japan and get freaked out by all kinds of stuff when I travel back to the US.
ONE FULL year!!!!!!!!
I also experienced it returning home from Japan.
But, I tend to feel uneasy with “fake” friendliness/politeness.
Many times I felt that, behind these smiling faces, the persons had no feelings or even negative feelings towards me…
I don’t know what I prefer, open rudeness or fake friendliness…
That guy sounds like a total asshole.
I can absolutely relate!
My reverse culture shock moment happened when I touched down and I ran to grab an order of the most American food I could think of: chili cheese fries. I was 5 minutes into enjoying my first taste of American crapfood in pure bliss when I noticed the table next to me staring at me in disgusted horror…
I was holding the plate up to my mouth and making that ramen-eating sucking sound without a care in the world! OOPS!
For me it was coming back from Taiwan after 4 years and being shocked at how FAT Americans are. I still haven’t gotten over it.
Strange returning to the home country after spending time overseas in uniform.
You’re ready to kill the ferriners’ then, coming home, you’re supposed to replace that with tolerance.
Was kinda’ hard not blowing away a few hundred idiotic self-centered scummy American scum over the years.
This reminds me when i came back from my 3 months in Japan.
“Irraishaimase!”, i think it took me about 2 weeks to stop feeling bad about ignoring the shop staff, used to nod and ackwardly look away.
Of course coming back home was indeed a culture shock in it self. Everything was in english, everyone was tall and yes when I went out with friends to have lunch the next i didn’t get my cup of water or geen tea.
Why are you buying bottled water?
You sound like an idiot for making such a big deal about getting the stupid little customary response from store workers. It’s like getting pissed that a cashier doesn’t say have a nice day.
Great story, thanks!
It reminded me of Parisian shopkeepers, where there is interaction - they say bonjour, and you respond with similar, and there is also an exchange of au revoir when leaving. It’s a formality, but it makes a difference, and if you ignore it, they will often show their displeasure.
After spending some time in Paris, we travelled down to Barcelona, and my wife commented how diffident the Spanish shopkeepers were… but I pointed out that this was just like being in Australia. We had become used to the civility shown in France.
Interesting story mate.
Interesting story mate.
I’m coming to the end of my first year here, in Japan, I am going back to England for a couple of weeks so ths kind of thing I’ve been thinkng of alot recently.
The old “Irrashaimase”, won’t be a problem and is something I will welcome not having around, but, i’m wondering about other things. I never feel threatened here and I am gladly used to the general politeness of the place. I’m wondering if Japan has turned me soft? Will I step off the plane and just revert to England mode or will I be wandering around bowing and leaving my wallet on the bar since noones going to steal it?Etc,etc .. etc.
That’s why it’s just a holiday before i’m back here!
Interesting experience, any other surprises or adjustments while home?
This is a grate way to become more human and cultural accustom with different way of perceiving reality.
I live in Japan for 5 years and no way I am going to go back home
Strange. When I lived in Japan (also for one year), I also came to love the people there and their sometimes idiosyncratic behavior. There were some very perplexing things and some very endearing things. Perplexing: the presence of S&M porn and borderline kiddy port (idols) in consumer electronics stores. Endearing: ever present shinto shrines in unexpected places, delicious deep fried mystery food at “Seven Eleven”, etc…
Being from the U.S.A, however, I was totally uninformed of the level of racism abroad! In Japan, I happened to be involved with a work environment that involved a few Korean contractors and Japanese nationals. The tension around these folks was heavy but very subtle (at least around me), and it took me some time to realize it was 100% along ethnic lines. Who knew? I guess I should’ve.
Of course, while in Japan, I had the chance to visit Northern Australia (Darwin / Katherine). While there, I witnessed a shockingly racist encounter between a shopkeep and an Aborigine. It went something like this:
Aborigine says “Green!”
[points to a flat case of Victoria Bitter (green cans)]
Shopkeep says “What else?”
[Aborigine is silent, appears to not understand but pulls about $AUS 60.00 out of his 70's looking soccer shorts (which is really all he is wearing besides a ncklace of some sort)]
Shopkeep picks up ALL of the cash and says “Get the fuck out”
Aborigine takes the beer and no change and beats (bare) feet out of the place.
I hadn’t a freaking CLUE what I just saw at the time. I thought the guy was being taken advantage of due to some mental condition that the clerk was privy to. I told the clerk he should give that guy some change ’cause there’s no way the beer was that expensive. He told me: “The Abo paid what he owed”. I still didn’t understand and got into somthing of a dustup which ended with the fellow throwing money at ME and berating ME for my protest to what was most assuredly some sort of racism.
Are we in the U.S. just naive about the amount of racism in the world? It seems like I was, at least. I was about 20 years old when this happened, and I had never really encountered racism in practice before. I left both Japan and Australia with very positive feelings about each place, but I couldn’t help but wonder how different my feelings may have been if I were Korean or Aboriginal…
Good story! Sorry to post something off topic like this, but it is what came to mind when I read this.
Considering that many stores now use electronic “irrashaimase” and “arigatougozaimasu” door chimes its a moot point. The reason it is said is not because it is polite, it is because it is correct and expected. Japanese society moves forward on the grease that is ‘aisatsu’, what is poorly translated to “greetings”. You could live in Japan fairly easily by remembering aisatsu for every situation (when giving/receiving gifts, when meeting someone of a higher social status, when entering someones home, etc) as this is most probably the one thing that is expected of you to know and use well.
I just wanted to add that I think I just re-experienced that reverse-culture shock with you, but I was experiencing it for the first time, so it would be culture shock for me? lol
Great read, none-the-less!
Yeah, I am living in Japan now for about 2 years, but returned to Europe for almost a half year. I could hardly stand it, and I dread the day I will return again.
The experience of living in Japan 1.5 yrs still lingers a few years afterward. What I miss most is being able to get anywhere I wanted in Tokyo with relative ease by train, bus, subway, on foot. You get such a feeling of mastery as you figure it out.
When I returned from Japan it was to Houston, Texas, and this is what I really remember: the vast, I mean absurdly wide, aisles at the supermarket. And that it used to be so hard to find a trash can in Japan (I always seemed to be carrying some trash with me) but any time you needed to take a leak, there was a public restroom right nearby. Look around in the US, there’s a trash can everywhere you look, but it’s hard to find a public restroom. I have to admit though that there are a lot more private restrooms than there used to be.
You sound like a pompous faggot. Who cares if the fuckin’ shopkeepers in Japan don’t greet you? You sound so self important. “I demand you greet me.” Yeah ok. I think the Japanese worker should have had the same response as the Indian guy. PUNK.
wonderful article.. it happend all d time.. wen u try to adjust with some other place u loose ur originality..
Now you know why Marty Friedman decided to live in Japan
I have to say i am confused by your action also..
I live in Nagoya and occasionally shopkeeper may not greet me but you dont stand there and stare waiting for the greeting, just go on with your way.
You are expecting too much of people now
wow. i got to get to japan real soon.
you should have told curry boy to get stuffed
Great Article!!!
BE sure to fix the tiny typo: He looks at me like I crawled out of a drainpipe, hands me my chance, and doesn’t even say “thank you”.
chance should be “change” right?
In my head, the Indian store clerks voice sounded like Apu from The Simpsons TV cartoon series….
Hys-TER-ical.
Gah; know the feeling! Returning to London…
I still point st my nose whilst referring to myself; forget to hold doors open for other people (or expect an weird look from women when I do), by microwaveable meals expecting the shop assistant to microwave it for me, recently gotten back to eating whilst taking a stroll and still think/feel that ‘Genki’ should gain some international recognition as the most appropriate emotion/question EVER!
Ja ne!
If a person has just welcomed me into their establishment, however formulaically, there MUST be a polite and respectful thing one could say in return. There must be a way to respond appropriately.
Why do you have to point out the guy in the shop was Indian? You wouldn’t point out the exact ethnicity of the shopkeeper if he was white. You wouldn’t say “I walked into a shop and this anglo saxon guy was behind the counter…”.
Maybe if you weren’t such a racist, you would find people treat you better.
I’ve been in China for 5 years and I know when I go home this summer some things are gonna freak me out
Great article. Lovely read.
I’m puzzled by your reaction when you didn’t receive the greeting in a japanese store as you were rude. You also should have walked out from the variety store instead of apologizing to the ignoramus while awaiting your parents.
um you sound like a racist. thanks for pointing out the fact the guy was indian. no wonder you get treated like crap wherever you go.
I have lived in Spain for several years and go home to the U.S.A. as often as I can. Every time I go home I experience some level of culture shock, although it doesn’t bother me anymore, mostly because I don’t expect anything special from anyone. My wife and I just joke and laugh about the differences between our cultures. We are always astonished at how fat people are, how dirty they are, and how the people don’t put any clothes on their kids. We often go home at Christmas and are amazed to see fat women in jackets with their kids in T-shirts.
As far as the culture here is Spain. I mostly just act as myself. After so many years over here, I am not looking for any kind of acceptance from the local population. Although some aspects of the local culture have leaked into my personal culture, I don’t make any real attempt to emulate the local populace. I just act like myself and they can take it or leave it. If I went into a shop in Japan and was welcomed I would respond. To hell with them if they don’t like it.
I found, after living for eight years in the north of the UK, the return to Australia was a relief. Back to friendly people and less violence.
I felt safer returning home. Has anyone else noticed this?
Oh, and “Bob” Dobbs, mate. I really hope, for your sake, that you are a troll. You seem to have missed the point of the story.
No Japanese would EVER stop and stare at store clerks who don’t say “irasshaimase”, that’s really rude of you. I’m greeted about 60% of all times I enter a shop (or when they pass me after I’ve entered), and the standard prodecure is to simply ignore them. It’s the same when they thank you after you’ve paid.
You have a favourite bottle water? Weird!
As a life-long resident of Orange County that hasn’t traveled at all out of the United States - I would say the clerk sounded like a rude DICK and deserves a worldly kick in the anus regardless of where he’s from.
Chewbacca would’ve done it before growling. Han Solo would’ve done it before shooting first. Jabba before frog-eating, etc.
I don’t get why some posters are being so rude… as if the guy offended them personally with his article. Senseless acts like these are truly disappointing.
You had to say an “Indian Guy” didn’t you, you androgynous piece of sushi ? Try living here in Bangladesh with a humidity rating of 95% in a scorching summer day and then speak crappy japanese welcoming verses.
Back in Switzerland after one year in Vancouver, I was waiting in front of a crosswalk. In Canada no car will stop to let you cross the road, so if you’re daydreaming in front of your crosswalk it doesn’t really matter.
But in Switzerland, it’s the law to stop if someone want to cross at a crosswalk. So when woke up from my dream look for crossing, lot’s of angry driver looking at me like “what the fuck are you waiting for???” weird situation….
also saying “thank you” ” You’welcome” and other reflex sentences to everybody.
I can’t wait to come back home again, from Australia this time, driving on the right etc… h«±h«±
I had a similar shock going to Germany for a year and coming back to the UK. Home never seems the same again but not in a bad way, at least you have the experience of a different culture under your belt
I am interested in the subtle differences in regions within nations. While traveling through the US I found distinct but unacknowledged rules regarding shop behavior. For example, people seem to mix freely in Arizona while in Georgia I made the mistake of stopping at a small neighborhood convenience store. It was made clear to me by the clerk and the patrons that my presence was unwelcome due to my race. My confusion was meant with rolling eyes, snorts and “Get on outta here.”
I am not offended by this behavior because I am the one who doesn’t know the rules. But herein lies the lure of travel.
What I don’t understand is why previous comments refer to the author as racist. I see nobody mentioned that the writer was sexist by referring to the clerk as a “guy.” If you think people in general do not form opinions about your race, ethnicity, sex, etc based on your behavior towards them, you are the ignorant one. If you care so much about what people think, why not go out of your way to be polite instead inciting more negative reactions?
the author is too sensitive. boo hoo, so nobody welcomes him in a 711 store. The world don’t revolve around you.
“In this case I smiled back to defuse the tension, and proceeded with my shopping.” you’re an asshole.
1 year in Japan and you’re only just like this?
Try being 23, British (thats white British) and lived in China for the past 18 years - I have nothing in common with my relatives back in the UK.
Its bizzare - I will never be Chinese, and I will never be British.
Good luck to you, young man!
In Bombay, the customer is always wrong.
Great post as always ff. A me too post from me. Spent about 1.5 years in China, HK and Korea. It is interesting what a powerful thing the sensitivity of one’s desire to fit in enforced by habit is. I still am uncomfortable to be touched on my head (Thailand) or to have someones feet or under soles pointing at me. I sometimes slip and fall into Chinese table manners picking up the bowl and shoveling rice into my mouth at the local Korean place much to the displeasure of Korean folks sitting around. I have to remind myself that it is OK to say excuse me as I bump into others in crowds (HK). I have to squash my irritation if someone beckons me with a crooked fore finger (as a dog). I guess as someone said we are the result of the sum total of our experiences.
Good story but try doing that after living in Japan for 5 years!! I have been back for 2 years and I am still suffering from reverse culture shock, but it’s not as bad in Hawaii as it is on the US Mainland. I was disgusted when I visited there. Rude, no customer service, etc. I think everyone should spend a year outside of their own country. It would make the world a better place.
I’m a Thai national living in the US. Similarly, when I go home to visit, I threw people off when I said thank you to the store clerks, waiters, street merchants, and cabbies. You see, over there, there’s a bit of a class thing going. You’re the servicing class. You do what you do. We, the paying customers, don’t have to thank you for anything. You should be thanking US. They are used to not being thanked. A small talk is sometimes expected but a thank you, never.
But many years in the US and being polite to fellow human beings who work hard to earn their pay just like everyone else got me to say thanks to everyone. The service folks were shocked. My mom used to urged me to stop thanking people so much. I wrote all about this over at Thai-Blogs.com if you’re interested to hop over.
You sound like a racist asshole. Maybe even the Japanese should have told you to fuck off to put you in your proper place.
very interesting read!
First off, I have to say that in every comment section there is the idiot who posts crap and it’s very annoying to read. That said, I agree 100% with the story. Having spent one year in South Korea I can totally relate. Although the culture is different the attitude is the same when you enter a store and it was confusing a bit when I went back home. Now I did spend a day in Japan for visa purposes and only now, after reading the story, did I realize what they were shouting at me as I entered a small store by the train station. Also interesting was the number of women riding bicycles with high heels.
I kept waiting for you to find out what “Irraishaimase!” really meant. Like it means ’stupid foreigner’ or something. That sort of would have been a better story. Going home and finding out everyone is rude is pretty similar to finding out that there are rude people everywhere. Though less shocking. Well written, though.
Firefly got used to all the little asian people kissin her butt, came to enjoy it, and then got dissappointed when the little brown people didn’t do the same thing back home.
Comment 77 is a bit harsh, but on the mark.
Interesting… The Japanese tend to treat white people very well, better than the locals. They tend to treat other East Asians relatively badly. Perhaps some of their innate racism has rubbed off on you, subconsciously, of course. You might want to be more aware of this and keep this in mind.
If you’re a white person, go visit Japan: generally speaking, you will be treated very well, get lots of attention, and be held in an elevated position… but when you return, just don’t expect to be more than an ‘average Joe’. I expect that’s why lots of white people would like to stay in Japan, but East Asian would rather not.
A fun and interesting read, I think you were clearly in the right waiting for that Indian guy to politely greet you, though. Maybe not “Irraishaimase” but Good Morning or the like. If he threatened me with security, I’d insult him and threaten him with his manager. Commendable weblog.
i gotta say, this is by far the best blog post i have ever read!!
and i thought my blog was the shit!!!
HaHaHa
This reminds me of my return. I stopped at the airport McDonald’s in Chicago. I was expecting the friendly Japanese McDonald’s greeting. Or at least a Welcome to McDonald’s may I take your order.
When I got to the front of the queue the “lady”-behind-the-counter’s welcome was “What?!”
Hello Tori,
Welcome to the good ole U. S. of A. Idiot!
Post 82 - “Japanese tend to treat white people very well, better than the locals…”
That’s because white people stand out, amongst a homogeneous population. Majority haven’t met people of another race.
The reverse culture shock is something that eventually goes away after traveling back and forth a few times. Like mentioned earlier i the comments, you change and so does your home country, but you don’t expect it to. But you kind of get used to it after doing it a few times.
Reverse culture shock is just as common as culture shock. Specially when one of the cultures is touchy-feely and you avoid such stuff.
My best friend lived in japan for a year and when i was driving him his first day back in America, he screams my name, stops, and says ‘woah, i almost bitched you out for driving on the wrong side of the road’
*note* japan drives on the left side, usa drives on the right side*