Sep 09 2008
“You know Ewan McGregor, for an extra 25 cents, you can make that a large coke.”
Here is a story I originally had in the Firefly Preqel, but I just couldn’t make it relevant to the main idea of the novel. So, I yanked it out and decided to put it up here.
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One of the benefits of working at one of the most prestigious cinemas in Sydney at that time, was that there were often large movie premieres with lots of famous Australian actors who would walk past, and occasionally drop by the Candy Bar.
One day at the cinema on Candy Bar duty, I was dimly aware of some kind of movie Premiere for “Snow Falling on a Cedar”. Ironically, it’s a film about a half Japanese guy.
I was absent-mindedly wiping down the surface of the bench, and 2 men walked over. I looked up, and they came into focus. I blinked. They seemed oddly familiar. Slowly, John Leguizamo and Ewen McGregor shifted into focus.
I swallowed my surprise, and offered a smile. Even back then, I admired Ewan as an actor. As a movie buff, I enjoyed pretty much all of his movies.
“Hi, how are you guys today?” I asked with an unnecessarily large grin on my face.
“We’re fine.” replied Ewan and John.
“Great. What can I get you?” I asked.
Ewan scanned the display and the popcorn on offer. He finally looked at me and said in a light Scottish accent, “Uh, can I have a medium coke, and a medium popcorn please.”
The sales training kicked in. I gulped. I fixed Ewan with my best salesperson smile, and I said, “You know Ewan, for an extra 25 cents, you can make that a large coke.”
Ewan look at me quizzically, and after a moment of deliberation, he laughed “Hah. Yeah ok, sure.”
It was a proud moment of my sales career. I had upsold Ewan McGregor ! My cinema manager would have been proud. I fixed his order, and provided him with his food. Ewan dropped a $10 note on the table, and I gave him his change.
Next up, was John Leguizamo. He sauntered over, and said in a fast voice, “Yeah hi, hows it going, ok? alright, I’ll have a small popcorn and a small coke. NO! Make that a medium popcorn and a small coke.”
My brow furrowed as I attempted to key in the order. To cancel an order, you need to press the item button again, and then the cancel button. If you need to delete an item you entered previously, you must delete everything before that order, just to remove the original item. This made things difficult when people changed their minds, but when someone is rapid fire attacking you with mind changes, it becomes almost impossible.
He was continuing, “Nah, I’m just kidding ya! HAH! I’ll have some m&m’s. And a popcorn. MAKE IT SMALL! And a coke too, of course, small. I mean large. I mean medium.”
I looked up in disbelief, to see he had a wide grin and seemed to be enjoying himself. I shook my head in disbelieving frustration, and I simply stopped entering orders, and gave him a deadpan look.
He continued to joke around, and I patiently waited for him to realise I wasn’t playing along, at which point he said, “I’ll just have the same as he did.” I nodded my head, smiled curtly, and prepared his order.
“That will be $9.45.” I said, and he looked at me distastefully.
“You mean I have to pay you money?” he asked incredulously.
I paused, considering my reply. “If you would like to have your popcorn and coke, then, uh, yeah.” I said.
He threw me a crisp $10 note, and gave me the change. Thanks John, if you’re reading this.





What a dick
so you are an uptight cashier with no sense of humor?
i want my 2 minutes back.
Go into retail. Go into FOOD SERVICE. You obviously have no clue how frustrating that can get, notamused. Especially if someone keeps running with it.
Leguizamo is a dick. I’ve got a question, was he cross-dressing in this movie? Perhaps he needed to ‘Man Up’ before seeing himself in a dress . . . AGAIN.
notamused, well, after about 3 minutes, the joke wears thin. Try it some time on your local friendly Starbucks girl.
Keitorin gets it.
He wasn’t even in the movie actually (I don’t think?). He must have been filming another movie with Ewan McGregor at the time, it seemed like they were just hanging out.
I worked with John Leguizamo in a small theater that was putting on one of his productions. He was by far, out of any celebrity I met, the nastiest. He really is nuts. Every 3 sentences is a homophobic remark(faggots!), he was always yelling about how stupid everyone was, he picks fights (he’s short, I think he has a Napoleonic complex). NO ONE in the building liked him, we were relieved when is show was over.
I guess even famous people can be dicks.