Firefly in Japan

The same friend who uses Partial Compliance to get out of doing something he doesn't want to do, also has compiled a small list of Gaijin Superpowers. I have made my own additions to this list, I'll publish them soon.

Azrael created the original idea through his awesome article on the Gaijin Smash, Gaijin Opticblast, and Gaijin Perimeter.

Here is the Gaijin Power of Partial Compliance, and it's backing theory.

If you're in Japan, you're probably already breaking some kind of rule or social custom. Right now. No matter what you're doing, or how. Most people go crazy before they come to Japan, and in the first few weeks of being here trying to work out the "culturally acceptable" way to act, but it's an uphill battle - since as you further integrate into Japanese culture, you get yourself into all sorts of new situations which have new customs, regulations and rules.

You could make an attempt to learn all of these, but it's highly recommended to just be as nice as possible to everyone, and try to enjoy the Japanese experience as much as possible.

Now, occasionally you will be placed in a situation with a regulation that just doesn't make a lot of sense. To give you a recent real life example, I was in the gym with the PC guy (Partial Compliance theorist), and this big guy walks past with a tattoo.

To give some background, Tattoos are banned from almost all public washrooms, sentos and onsens. The main reason (as I understand it), is that many Yakuza have huge full body tattoos that intimidate and scare other people. So, a good blanket way to keep out the undesirables, is to implement a blanket rule saying "no people with tattoos may partake in our establishment". Which is really kind of silly for some foreigner with a small tatoo on his bicep - it just shouldn't really apply to him.

Now, I can imagine the conversation between the tattoo guy, and the gym staff.

Gym Staff : Oh... I am very, very sorry, but unfortunately, you cannot use this gym. I am very sorry. Please accept my apologies, I have no excuse for my actions. (Japanese Humble attack -35 damage)

Tattoo Guy : Nah, it's alright. It's just a small tat. Don't worry about it.
(Attempted Gaijin Smash)

Gym Staff : Um.... I am very sorry, but it is in the rules. (Nullified Gaijin Smash with Bureaucracy - 10 damage)

Tatoo Guy (realised Gaijin Smash did not work, attempting different manoeuvre) : So, people get upset if they see a tattoo? (Gaijin Power Partial Compliance Layup)

Gym Staff (missing the Layup) : Yes, exactly. I am terribly, terribly sorry.

Tattoo Guy : Ok. I understand.

Gym Staff (VICTORY!!!) : Thank you for your understanding. I'm so sorry.

This is where the Gaijin Power of Partial Compliance comes into force. 3 minutes later :

Tattoo Guy walks out of the locker room with a small piece of tape covering about 40% of his tattoo.

Gym Staff (Oh, shit) : Um, excuse me sir?

Tattoo Guy : Look buddy, I know you're doing your job, I understand. Here, look, I covered my Tattoo. Pretty cool huh? (Combo Gaijin Smash and Partial Compliance -240 damage)

Gym Staff : Oh... umm... right... errr. actually.... welll....

Tatoo Guy : Seeya (Flawless Victory)

Now, the irony here is that the tape covering the tattoo draws more attention to the tatoo. However, since the Gym Staff saw that Tatoo Guy made a solid effort to try to do something to comply with the regulation, it becomes much, much more difficult for Gym Staff to win. Most people simple give up here, as Gym Staff most likely did.

There is the theory and practice behind the Gaijin Power Partial Compliance - I hope you enjoyed that.

Living in Japan can be rewarding and frustrating. There a lot more rules and customs that must be followed, and naturally people can become confused or unsure as to the best way to proceed.

There are two solutions to this situation. The first is the Japanese way - keeping the wa (harmony), asking people around you, being extremely polite and careful. This sometimes works.

The second (and I would say, more popular) method is the "gaijin smash". The "gaijin smash" has been in existence since Perry decided that Japan would be best off opening its doors and begining trade. There was initial resistance by Japan, which then prompted the first known incidence in Japanese history of the gaijin smash. It is a term created by Azareal, who has now found a home at www.gaijinsmash.net. You can find the original gaijin smash article here.

Its basically where you impose your outlandish foreign will onto a person or group of people to achieve your desired outcome. You basically give a Japanese person the choice between extreme pressure and a possibly angry foreigner (for a Japanese person raised on avoiding conflicts, never a good thing), or the easy choice of simply giving the foreigner what they want. If applied correctly, you'll almost always get what you want, often bending or breaking the rules (which in defense of foreigners, are mostly nonsensical).

I don't advocate the Gaijin Smash for anything but the most dire of emergencies or the most ridiculous of rules/regulations, since it does cause a good amount of anguish and frustration for the receiving Japanese. Having said that, it is extremely effective and worth having in your back pocket.

Although it's not something I'm particularly proud of, I am very good at this. When I really require something, few gaijin can match the power of my smash. I have an American friend whos special power lies in partial compliance, which is also a deadly weapon against inefficiency and unnecessary rules and regulations. More on partial compliance next time.

A few weeks ago, I was having a chat with the friend of a friend, a short Japanese girl. She had learned a bit of English, and she was interested to go overseas and explore the world. I was impressed by this – at least temporarily. The conversation went something like this :

Me : So, where have you been overseas?
Her : Actually, I’ve never left Japan.
Me : Oh, I see. In that case, where do you want to go?
Her : I don’t know… I’ve been thinking about Canada, or maybe Italy.
Me : That’s great. So when are you going?
Her : Well… actually… I can’t go.
Me : Oh. Why not?
Her : I don’t have the courage.
Me : The courage?
Her : Right. I want to go, but I don’t have the courage to go.

From my perspective, this is a really weird thing to say. I can understand the safety problems of a woman travelling by herself, or even in a group. In this situation, she would need to check how safe each country is, and make sure she was in a hotel in a good part of town, and make sure she knew the numbers of local Japanese speaking Police representatives,etc. But for someone to not go overseas because of a lack of courage confounds me. This idea is so far out of my reality, that I can’t even comprehend the mindset that created it.

I think it’s a completely lame mindset. To put things in perspective, the idea that someone shouldn’t do something because “something bad might happen”, is certainly not an idea limited to Japan. However, this “not doing something because of fear” mindset certainly seems to be much more prevalent at least around Tokyo, and also judging from a number of Japanese people I’ve met in Japan.

At one point in time, most of our family and friends have advised us to not do something because of possible negative consequences. These people almost always have our wellbeing in mind when they give their advice, but their concern blinds them to the more important core issue. As human beings we grow by exploring new things, visiting new countries, having new experiences and doing things we’ve never done before. As soon as we DON’T do something out of fear (or lack of courage), we begin to stagnate. We stay in the same routine, our lives don’t change, and without any growth or new experiences, we take another step towards death.

If it means I would grow as a person, I would definitely do something that scares me, and I would encourage my friends and family to do the same. Think about this the next time your friend or a member of your family asks for your guidance on something they want to do. Tell them to “Feel the Fear, and Do It Anyway” (I highly recommend this book).

Well, it's the 8th of November, which means that Starbucks (and every other kind of shop) begin playing cheesy Christmas Carols on loop. These drive me absolutely crazy, and I'm actually looking forward to the return of the regular shitty muzak.

I want to talk about something interesting in Japan - the concept and idea of politeness. More importantly, how the concept of politeness overseas integrates into Japanese culture.

Last night, I was in Shibuya station. I was heading home, and I was in a bit of a rush. All of a sudden, a small opening appeared in the crowd. I immediately starting walking towards it. At the same time, I spotted a woman directly to my left who was equally the same distance from the opening. We both looked at each other, and I immediately shot for the opening, and dissappeared into the crowd.

After this event, when I was on the train, I realised that by Western standards, I was very rude. However by Japanese standards, it was a completely natural thing to do. The concept of "women first", does not exist in Japan. In fact, I realised that the lady from the crowd would have allowed me to take the opening, and if I waited for her to take it, she probably wouldn't have. So my actions were actually culturally appropriate, and more time efficient.

If however, I did the same thing in Australia or America, I would surprise the woman, and at the very least, receive distasteful looks from the people around me.

In other situations in Japan, when I instinctively gesture for a woman to go first, I receive a confused look, and after she confirms that I am offering her the chance to go first, she generally proceeds cautiously and awkwardly.

This is a rare cultural gap, at least from a foreign perspective, where a foreign custom would actually be more polite than a Japanese custom.

Tokyo is a pretty magical place. Nowhere else in the world can match it for it's size, events, bustle and blade runner aura. I love all of these things about Tokyo.

I love the fact that there is a shop in Akihabara specialising ONLY in selling English games, magazines and paraphernalia.

I love being within 30 minutes of a fully featured themepark with 2 rollercoasters.

I love hopping on my scooter and exploring the strange and often overlooked jungle of backstreets and eccentric shops.

I love being within a 5 minute scooter ride of every class of food imaginable, and plenty of high quality, low price healthy Japanese food.

I love going out with friends and having unlimited choice as to where to go, and what to do.

There are a lot of things to like about this city. But at the end of the day, it's still a city. A sprawling, grey metropolis. Millions of people packed into a small city, rushing about their Tokyo lives. It's enough to fascinate you if you've been here for a few days, and enough to drive you stir-crazy after a few years.

It's also hard not to be affected by the pressure of Japan. All Japanese people have a set of expectations and guidelines imposed onto them by all other Japanese in the vicinity. As a foreigner, we're generally not expected to conform to these guidelines. However after years continuously living here, it's hard not to conform on some level. Conforming to Japanese social regulations is uncomfortable at best. More on this in another post.

Whenever I start to really feel boxed in, I look up my calendar. I almost always find that my trip back to Australia has surreptitiously passed the 1 year mark. This time, I have been in Japan for 14 straight months. I need a break. I need to go to a beach, drive a car, visit a small town, sit outside next to a beach on a sunny day drinking a cappuccino and eating bacon and eggs.

Soon, I will return home. Once I have recharged my batteries and have enough English conversation with friends and family to last another 12 months, I hop on a plane and begin the process all over again.

Interesting enough, I now get homesick wherever I go. When I'm in Tokyo, I feel homesick for all the pleasures and comforts of home. When I'm home, I miss good sushi, excellent service, amazing efficiency, the unique and powerful Japanese ability to persevere and sort things out. Hopefully one day I'll be equally comfortable in either location.